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Why do children lie?

“Our son/daughter is lying! What do we do?” is a frequent complaint of parents in the office of a child psychologist. Parents wonder why their child is lying, because in their family, this behavior is not practiced. Others simply burn with shame for their child – lie their baby becomes public property, have already learned teachers or educators. There are among parents and those who are completely deluded by their child’s behavior. They admit that they don’t know what to believe and what not.

But what would have been the reaction of parents to lie to children, the ratio is always unambiguously negative. And the question of what to do and how to wean the child to lie, to tell lies and mislead others in, is very relevant.

A psychologist come when all known methods have been tried. A request or an order “Stop lying!” the child was ignored, physical punishment does not have the desired effect, and the threats were not heeded. To understand what to do in situations when your child is cheating, let’s see, why and why he does it.

Why do children lie?

Children lying is a very common phenomenon, but in each case it’s always a unique story. However, in most cases, a lie is a consequence of the child’s problem, not the problem itself. Therefore, to defeat the lies, we must find Continue reading

Does the child Have to help strangers?

 

“The victims he chose from among the children who are alone walking on the street or were in the wilderness. The attacker approached him, turning under the pretext – to the streets, the location of which he allegedly did not know.”

In another case, the lost boy could not learn how to get him to the bus stop, as he met on the way the students just ran away from him without explanation.

This information from news feeds shows us one of the issues of the day: “does the child Have to help strangers?”. It is my opinion.

The child SHOULD NOT help strangers. BUT it CAN be done most carefully and tentatively ensuring their OWN SECURITY.

What might it look like in practice? In the first case, the man asks the child to show the way to the street of Lenin, and almost every city has such a street. The child, for example, knows how to this street pass.

But his first reaction should be as follows: assessment of the situation, retreat to a safe distance (2 meters), ending the conversation and leaving in a safe place. We talked about this in the article, Continue reading

Break

 

“Temporary separation strengthens the relationship”, I think you have heard it said? But is this true? In fact, the breakup only helps to better appreciate and understand the depth and strength of their own feelings, but whether the result of a temporary parting strengthening relations or they will stop — depends on many circumstances.

A break in the relationship may occur due to natural causes – forced departure, trip, etc. But is it worth to create such circumstances artificially? – Yes, sometimes it is impossible to do, but not always necessary.

If in a relationship it’s okay, I wouldn’t advise you to take a break just to “check your feelings”. In this there is no need, and the temporary artificial separation will do more harm than good. But sometimes a break in the relationship becomes the last resort to preserve them.

It happens that your communication reaches the stage where the partners are in need of some space and the need to “take a break”, with the belief that such a break will strengthen their bond. Let’s see if I take a break to save a relationship or not helps.

A break is not an alternative to the clarification Continue reading

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