L. Ron Hubbard
(source “Miracles for Breakfast” Ruth Minshull, p. 10)
What are the fears of the child. Where do they come from? How do we, parents, when different stages of a child’s life the nature of children’s fears are different. This is due to the child transitions to a higher level in its development. And, anyway, there is quite a capable system enabling the parent to be the surest method to respond to changes in the child’s behavior. This system is based primarily on typical age-related changes in children.
I want first of all to say about fear of children before, so they can stay simply ALONE WITH THEIR EXPERIENCES. This is the greatest and hardest burden for the baby. and for a teenager. A parent can learn about it, it started to communicate with the child about it. But all the drama is that it puts adults in a deadlock. Why? Because we mistakenly believe our role is to protect the child by simple exclusion fear of his life. However, does it help? Here is one story – a conversation Katie (she’s four years old) and her mom in the dressing room dance Studio:
Kate: Mom, let’s get going. There in the corner, you may receive a bogeyman.
(girl pointing finger in a far dark corner of the room)
Mom: Well, what’s the bogeyman! Barmalei does not happen. He only lives in a fairy tale.
Kate: Sometimes I’ve seen!
Mom: don’t be so silly, sasahivi shoes and let’s go.
Katya: button Itself, I’m afraid!
Mom: What are you afraid of, zip up boots? Here’s to lazy girls Barmalyeyi and come…
Alas, but in this story the mother is only partially came to the rescue of his daughter. Mom is more focused on the pace at which Kate wears clothes. Although the child himself eloquently hinted at what stage of life he is and what problems now puzzled.
I’m willing to accept that the parent is not always the most may be clear how to explain the little nuances of the surrounding world. Therefore, call your attention: children’s fears for children aged 2-3 years are connected with that incredibly large flow of information from the external world becomes available not only for the perception of the baby. but for its interpretation. The child literally absorbs everything is new, absorb continuous stream, all without a trace, taking all and believing what he sees. Getting acquainted with new objects, their properties, all phenomena, the child is your own experience. And that’s exactly cognition, acquaintance! Yet the child has no ability to form causal relationships. When in the toilet drain water and something disappears from sight baby, the most important for your child what he just saw something, and it was… now gone.
At the AGE of THREE eloquently draw attention to themselves, for example: the reluctance of the child to sleep alone, instead of with respect to changes in the external appearance close (glasses, hairstyle…), the fear of animals. Sometimes it is also of particular signals addressed to the parents: the child may be afraid of the toilet, especially when it pumped water; fear can cause water pipes, dark, broken items – primarily toys that do not have the entire parts (the plane with a broken wing, a doll without a head, a bike without wheels, etc.). Now the moms and dads to overcome their fears – is not a denial of the fear of the baby or cause for fear: «no», «invent”, “Well, where have you seen” and the like. The help of parents, right now – timely dialogue on the topic of what is and what is connected where that comes from and why. Gradually learning about the causes of events and their possible consequences, with the support and empathy of loved ones, the baby will be able to find the strength to cope with his frightening phenomena.
At the AGE of SIX YEARS is noteworthy that the child’s behavior when his fears are largely the fruit of his own imagination, a figment of fiction. Impressions from the events of the last day, fairy tales and cartoons, developing creative thinking of a preschool child, turns into a very specific characters. Fear can manifest itself in the waking hours and at night horrible dreams. This Money-GE, and Barmalei, and any monster… the Child does not want to put up with it. And often overcoming child such fears manifested by the need to be sure that a good, beautiful, reliable companion in his life is always there. And we are with you – parents! Child’s awareness of the apologist: “I am NOT ALONE– – this is the Foundation on which the child builds confidence in themselves and their capabilities.
to stay calm and really listen and hear your child;
make efforts to ensure that don’t be annoyed when the child is upset in situations that you, the adult, seem completely harmless;
be careful about how the child in situations where he’s concerned;
not to transform communication in the “interrogation” baby.
So with your help, the child has learned how it is possible to contact with objects that cause fear or fears. And learned how you can relate to some of the events at this stage only to frighten.
Are you the parent are the best, most desired and the most competent and therefore only: intentionally with the child enter into a dark room, in a language he understands talk about how and why people sleep, offer the baby alone to turn on and off the night light in the bedroom and PLAY MORE with him. In the game you will be able to simulate those situations that are alarming or fully afraid of the child. In the game you will be able to acquaint the child with the properties of many items and devices that constitute an integral part of our modern life. It is playing, fantasizing, the child becomes easier to step over stresie his situation. We adults, when faced with difficulties, most likely, talk about it with someone. And kids are more likely to play, to experiment in the game with the problem, then, the experience and knowledge to carry with him his entire adult life. And if a parent has the courage to admit that the feeling of fear exists, and promptly confirm to the son or daughter of their understanding, it will be the best way to help the fear to disappear.
With respect, it is sometimes, difficult everyday life of Katie and her mom,
writer, author of books
“Caution: children!” and “Caution: parents!” –
about child discipline and understanding between parents and children.